How I manage to get any sleep as a new mama

Okay so I totally struggled with what to title this post because we aren’t exactly on a “schedule” yet,
more like a night time routine that happens often, but not always lol

We are officially parents of an ALMOST 1 month old… WHAT?!? So crazy to me.
Our pediatrician told us at our last appointment that there’s really no reason to try and get Hayes on a strict schedule yet, he’s still so little and is kind of going to be doing what he wants when he wants, so right now I just nurse him when he’s hungry, and let him sleep when he’s sleeping.
However, I have been trying to keep him awake a little more during the day time so that he understands day from night a little better!

Alright, here we go…
As a new mama it is SO hard to start a schedule… you’re in survival mode, you’re exhausted,
and honestly, the last thing you want is to be following a timeline or a schedule…
So, unlike most people, I’ve been pretty chill about the whole schedule thing.
Will I regret this later? maybe? maybe not? Who knows.
But this is what’s been working for us right now!!

So we currently bathe Hayes twice a week, we’ve designated Tuesdays and Fridays as our bath days!
Newborns have super sensitive skin and they really don’t get dirty, so if you bathe them
too often it can cause their skin to majorly dry out and start peeling.
Kyle gets home from work around 5:30/6 and we typically go on a little family walk.
On Tuesdays and Fridays (bath nights) we try to give Hayes his bath around 7:30!
After his bath we put coconut oil all over his little body as a lotion/moisturizer,
and then we “prep the house” for bed – This step is SUPER important.
My sweet friend Jamie filled me in on this and I’m SO thankful she did….
So babies are VERY easily overstimulated.
So at night time, we make sure to dim all the lights in the house, make sure the TV isn’t too loud and keep things as calm and “night time” like as possible.

So in order for me to get a couple hours of uninterrupted sleep, I nurse Hayes and go to bed around 8 or 9.
Kyle stays up with him and they hang out in the living room and if he happens to get hungry again Kyle will give him a bottle of my breastmilk so I can rest.
At first I was really nervous to give Hayes a bottle, I was so worried that giving him a bottle would make him not want to breastfeed, BUT after a week of pretty much NO sleep whatsoever, you’ll do anything lol
And good news, he still prefers his mama!

So when I go to bed around 8 or 9, this is when my “main sleep” happens. I know Hayes is being cared for by his daddy and I don’t have to feed him anytime soon since he’ll be getting a bottle and I can finally relax.
This sleep stretch can be anywhere from 1-4 hours.
Those 4 hour nights are extremely rare but goodness they’re incredible and make me feel like I can conquer the world! Those 1 hour nights are TOUGH and are when Hayes is cluster feeding or can only be soothed by his mama.

Around 11 or 12 they’ll both come to bed and Hayes is typically ready to eat again,
so i’ll nurse him, change his diaper and then mama night shift begins!
Every night is different, Hayes typically wakes up about every 2 hours to eat, and I’ll feed him, burp him and change him.
Occasionally he’ll want to eat every hour and those nights are longggggg and tough, life with a newborn is just really unpredictable!
I stay in bed when I nurse him and Kyle is usually able to sleep through it, which is good!

I’m sure I’ll get some questions about this so I’ll go ahead and answer!!
Yes, Hayes sleeps in bed with us and No, I never thought/planned we would be co sleeping.
He sleeps right in between us in his Dock A Tot and I love having him close by, for right now.
He’s still my tiny little newborn and I totally get separation anxiety when I can’t see or hear him.
Although I LOVE having Hayes right next to me, Kyle and I are definitely missing going to bed together and sleeping next to each other, so I’m not sure how long this “routine” and co sleeping thing are going to last.
BUT for right now, it’s what works for us!

I also want to share a few things that I think really help Hayes sleep at night!
Kyle and I have always had the TV on at night when we fall asleep but ladies and gentlemen,
that is now a thing of the past.
I started to notice pretty quickly that the flashing lights from the TV were keeping Hayes awake
and it was amazing how quickly he would settle down once the TV was off!
Another thing that I think is a total miracle worker is “shushing”,
I’m pretty sure they make actual devices that do this but we use Kyle’s work phone and just
youtube “8-10 hours of baby shushing” and it really does soothe Hayes, and honestly it soothes us too! lol

I always have a pacifier close by as well, sometimes Hayes will take it and sometimes he won’t,
but those nights that he does take it, it’s a life saver!
We’ve also been using some Essential Oils for bed time, diffusing and also applying to Hayes’s little feet.
Let me know if y’all are interested in knowing more about which oils we’ve been using.

I know a lot of you were hoping for some kind of routine or daily schedule post,
but that’s just not our reality right now. I hope this was at least somewhat helpful though!!
To all you mamas reading this, IT’S ALMOST THE WEEKEND!!!!!

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10 Comments

  1. Alanna
    March 22, 2018 / 9:18 am

    I would love to know about the essential oils you’re using! Congrats!

  2. Sam
    March 22, 2018 / 9:32 am

    Yes essential oil wisdom please! I also have a newborn and am loving all your tips and mommy posts!

  3. Alejandra
    March 22, 2018 / 10:03 am

    I LOVE this post! I’ve been struggling with the thought that we havent been able to get a schedule down for my one month old daughter since everyone and their momma seen to have one for their babies. We try our best to stick to a routine but sometime it just doesn’t happen and I have been having to accept that its just how it is sometimes with a newborn. She has also been cosleeping with us more then I ever thought she would be but it does help me get more snooze time in especially after those feedings when she just wont burp. I’d go crazy with worry if I put her back in the bassinet.
    Thank you for keeping it real and helping tgis first time momma not feel so alone and crazy!

    • Mery
      April 2, 2018 / 3:33 pm

      We also cosleep more than we thought! at first it was a survival technique, now i can’t stand not being with her and hearing her breathe… and she’s 2 and 1/2… i judged those who did cosleep… i will never judge a mom ever after my experience

  4. Lodoe
    March 22, 2018 / 10:11 am

    Glad to read this as you do the same thing as I do on regular base with no schedule yet for my little one too lol
    Before I was thinking that I m the only one who doesn’t have schedule for my little one . Now I feel better to read your blog … Thank you for sharing your routine 💕

  5. Amanda
    March 22, 2018 / 10:18 am

    Thank you for sharing! Yes, what oils are you using? Also, when do did you start pumping and when are you pumping?

  6. March 22, 2018 / 10:53 am

    Looooooove this post! I’m 2 months from due date and have loved being right behind yah! I’d love to know more about what essential oils your diffusing / and applying to him. Also, typically how long are your feeds?

  7. Nicole Leiker
    March 22, 2018 / 3:03 pm

    I’d love to know what oils you’re using! We use Young Living, and I have most of the kidscent line. I diffuse the sleeping one and sometimes the sniffleze one because my little one has been so congested lately ): where on his feet are you applying them? I’ve been too nervous to put them directly on his skin, but he’s about 2 months now so I’m sure he can handle it!

  8. Ray faour
    April 2, 2018 / 11:58 am

    Mmmmm I love hearing new moms worry about schedules ! ! .. honestly befor 4-6 months it will be super hard to start a schedule. I usually go with the flow ( just make sure they nap) and co sleep untill they are at an age where I can sleep train (usually around 5 months) . Even with sleep training schedules keep changing untill 2 yrs… they will keep dropping naps untill then…not to mention sleep regressions and growth spurts… so good on u for being chill…

  9. Mery
    April 2, 2018 / 3:35 pm

    It is so refreshing to read your post, i think i am reading my story of my baby (she is now 2 and a half). We started co-sleeping because nothing worked… we got all crib and things prepared, i was ready to saddle and knew the technique… nothing worked.. she only wanted to be with me… later down the road… few things happened that made us think and reaffirm that for us co-sleeping was the best. Having her close by, being with her if she is sick, hearing her breathe… i can go on… but each child is different…. for us we took all the measurements to have a great experience for as long as it lasts… i am also still nursing her and i love it!!!

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